So, at the end of last year I moved to a new country for study, it was not an easy decision but it was a decision that needed to be made nevertheless. Although I promised Sayi that I would resurrect this blog immediately I arrive in Italy and fill it with loads and loads of Italian content and experiences, I am ashamed to say that I have over-promised and under-delivered once again.
Anyways, even though I am five months late, I am back to writing and hopefully I can maintain a little bit of momentum. I think what inspired this post was me finally realizing that there has been a major shift in my psyche in the past months. It was like an awakening, something like catching a reflection of yourself in the mirror and realizing that the face staring back at you is not who you are.
I guess what I’m trying to say is that my social life is practically non-existent! I know I should not be too hard on myself considering that relocating to a new country in the middle of the pandemic can be quite hard but still I could have done better. There are a lot of nuances to my current situation but I refuse to see the glass as being half empty because dwelling on the apparent hindrances to my integration will only serve to keep me in a terrible mental and social state.
When I lived in Lagos, I was a one-man army most of the time and I navigated it quite well if I do say so myself. I went out on my own, drove around town, went for solo brunches and participated in events that caught my fancy without needing a companion. It wasn’t perfect all the time but the point is that my mindset when I lived in Lagos was that “I can do bad all by myself”
Coming to Bologna, I totally lost that mindset, somehow it became locked into the central part of my head that I need a chaperone, a guide or some sort of anchor in order to live a full life here. While this makes sense on the surface considering that I’m in an entirely new location with a different culture and especially a language that I can barely understand, it is incredibly limiting and downright lazy if we’re being honest. I think I just wanted to take the easy way out because going at it alone here will definitely not be easy and require lots of effort but it is not an unsurmountable task.
I finally resolved this weekend to work at bringing back the face I will recognize in a mirror reflection, the chap who lives life freely on his own terms in his own way, not waiting for validation or external motivation to exist or enjoy the simple pleasures of life. So, cheers to me regaling you with tales of my experiences and foray into the beautiful life in this beautiful city and control, hopefully I get to maintain this moment and you get to read from me again soon.
Ciao.
Seyi Adeoye's Blog 